Tuesday, 3 June 2008

The worst start to a day ever?

Oh dear. Life feels very difficult this morning. Was woken by a scream of outrage from eldest daughter because the tooth fairy had forgotten to collect her tooth and leave a nice shiny pound coin in its place. D'oh!!! Tooth Fairy alias was too busy drinking wine and reading last night to remember. I am a failure at motherhood. Rubbish.

Then the screams came from me as I realised we had another nit nightmare upon us so had to wash and comb offspring's hair with gallons of conditioner and nit comb before school, meaning lateness on school run. Gross. I am a bit itchy too to be honest... Sometimes it's disgusting, living with children. Where's Malory Towers when you need it??

I am quite scared about what's going to happen next, you know. If I don't blog again, you'll know I've been eaten by a pack of gigantic headlice...

16 comments:

Clare Sudbery said...

My weekend last weekend was ruined by headlice. Sent all plans into total disarray. Son was supposed to be on his way to grandparents for half term for the week, but grandmother (my mum) can't cope with headlice at all and got all hysterical, and I had to have my hair cut short to make it easier to rid myself of the little buggers, and mum said F could only go for a few days instead of whole week which meant we had to cancel plans for music festy and do panicky babysitter-hunting for Expensive Dance Event in the evening, and I didn't tell the hairdresser I had nits and worried they'd send me home in disgrace (as it was they didn't seem to notice, but I had done a particularly thorough comb-through immediately beforehand)...

All horrid. But as usual the reality not as bad as you anticipate. Just a lot of hair-washing and combing. My head seems clear now only a week later, and although F still has some (I suspect my mum didn't do a very thorough job when she had him), they're nearly gone. And we've developed a new routine, whereby I jump in bath and do me, then he jumps in with me and sits between my legs playing with his bionicles while I do him. Rather a nice mother-son bonding thing, in fact. Like monkeys, I guess.

Although reading/writing this has made my head itch...

Calistro said...

I'd love to hear what excuse you made for the tooth fairy not appearing. Was she ill? On holiday? Out on a date with Mr Tooth Fairy?

Lucy Diamond said...

Hi Clare, why do headlice exist? I'm sure they serve no purpose whatsoever other than to stress out us parents. aarrgghh! Still - Bionicles in the bath, sounds like boy heaven there at least!

Calistro - I muttered something about the stormy weather last night and said maybe the tooth fairy hadn't been able to battle through the storm. It's tricky because I don't want to get too bogged down with deception and spin too elaborate a web of porky pies (now there's an image). But she was so gutted, I felt I had to come up with something reasonably plausible-sounding!

JJ said...

Oh gawd. I remember those nit attack days with great clarity. Yuk. I hated them ... I quite like the idea of weevils now!

Hope you get them cleared away soon.

Clare Sudbery said...

Incidentally, do you check for nits weekly like you're supposed to, or do you - like me - just wait til you happen to notice them? Luckliy me and my son get itchy heads, so we notice quickly. Apparently most people don't get head-itching with nits.

this is only our second infestation and F is 6 already, so I spose we've been lucky. My partner hasn't had them at all yet, and neither have our next door neighbours (whose kids are in F's class and 1 year above at same school). They all reckon they're immune. Ha. That's what I used to think (I never got them as a kid). I'm ashamed to say F and I have been plotting to infest his dad on purpose, just so he can see what it's like. We don't mean it though. Not really.

mjmoore said...

I've had both of those happen. One morning my eldest got up and told me her tooth was still under the pillow (thankfully she wasn't too hysterical) - about 20 mins, I took her coin down, and said that I'd just checked, and it was there.. the tooth fairy had obviously had a very busy night, and was running late! hehe

girl with the mask said...

As a childless twentysomething can I just say... headlice? Ohmygosh!

Lucy Diamond said...

JJ - I'll swap your weevils for the nits any day! The sink was practically rattling with the little buggers last night, the number that we combed out of my poor daughter's hair. Hopefully they're on their way out...

Clare, I wish I could be the kind of mum who does a weekly check of heads but... I'm not. It was only the ferocious scratching that alerted me (too late). Sigh. Only the second time we've had them too but I just know there will be many more times sadly...
PS You must make it a challenge to get your smug neighbours infested... Serve them right!

Michelle - ahhh, quick thinking there, mrs! Nice one. Obviously I will never forget Tooth Fairy duty again (ahem) but if miraculously it happens again, I will remember your expertise and try that one!

Girl - ahh, childless twenty-something days. I remember those. Such fun. Such freedom. Not a nit comb in sight... *weeps*

girl with the mask said...

THERE ARE SUCH THINGS AS COMBS FOR NITS?!

Lucy Diamond said...

Girl - Truly, ignorance is bliss when it comes to the world of nits. Stay in that nice nit-free bubble for as long as you can humanly manage it!

Sarah Ball said...

Lucy, when we forgot to replace our daughter's tooth with a coin we told her that we had an NHS tooth fairy and she was down on a waiting list. It's a great excuse and a good early lesson about the health service too :)
Sx

Lucy Diamond said...

NHS tooth fairy - now that's inspired! I feel as if I'm armed with several good excuses now!

Jane Henry said...

oh god. Head Lice... We haven't had them for ages, we are bound for a bout soon...

I agree about living with children, but we've just acquired a bunny and a guinea pig and they are WORSE...

Uggh. I had to clean them out yesterday.

Lucy Diamond said...

Oh no!!! I sympathise, all that soggy hay and... ugh.
See, you're obviously a much nicer mum than me. You do the pet thing. I am still standing firm on that one!

Leigh said...

What do you mean, sometimes it's disgusting living with children?

The day I don't end up covered in dribble, snot, poo, or goo-of-indeterminate-origin, I will be a happy girl.

Lucy Diamond said...

*sigh* It's so depressing, isn't it? Once upon a time, I used to smell nice and everything. Now...