Scene: kitchen table, yesterday evening, eldest daughter and son finishing tea.
Daughter (moodily pushing piece of fish around her plate): Who decided that I was going to be a meat-eater, anyway?
Me (taken aback): Well, you did.
Daughter (dropping fork dramatically): No, I didn't!
Me: Yes, you did. You don't have to eat meat. If you want to be a vegetarian like Dad, that's fine. But that means you have to eat extra things like eggs, nuts and cheese, for protein. (*wicked smile on face*) And lots of vegetables.
Daughter (pulling face): Yuck. I don't want to be a vegetarian. I'm going to be an omelette.
Me (even more taken-aback): You're going to be an omelette?
Daughter: Yep. We learned about it at school. It's like an in-between thing. Where you don't eat meat and you don't eat vegetable stuff either.
Son (ears pricking up): I want to be an omelette too.
Me (mystified): An omelette? (realisation dawning): Ahhhh. Do you mean an omnivore?
Daughter: That's what I said!
Me (trying not to laugh): Ahh. Well, I think it means something slightly different actually...
PS I am so happy to have raised two little omelettes. Does that make me Mother Hen, do you think?
20 hours ago